First Reconciliation

I tug on my new dress and look around

As if my mom could hear me from the pew.

My priest’s near face now seems to be too far,

Too tall, too big, too powerful for me

To be myself here anymore, but here

I am. And I have practiced. I’ve spent time,

I have been thinking about what to say

When I got here. What words to say to him-

To Him. But as I sit in the make shift

Confessional, in the far back of the church

After waiting in line to see the priest

Who looked the nicest – the most forgiving,

All I can do is stare at his green garb

Hoping the words I practiced will appear.

I have talked back to both my mom and dad

And yelled and fought and punched my brother, And

I’m truly sorry. Your sins are now absolved.

Please go in peace and pray for me. My feet,

Now light and free, return me to my mom

Outside into the light that’s now too bright,

Too harsh, too much for me to know where I

Now am – and so, I reach to hold her hand

But gravity pulls my arm back to my side.